Tuesday, August 15, 2006

The Perils of Owning a Jack Russell

As you know, I am the proud owner of a wonderful Jack Russell, called Gio. I am pleased to say he has never behaved quite as badly as Bert, a Jack Russell owned by Tory MP Andrew Turner. Bert took it upon himself to embarrass his owner while visiting the Isle of Wight Show when he savaged a Polecat to death. I wonder if it was 'semi housed trained' a la Michael Foot's description of Norman Tebbit. Her Majesty's Press certainly missed a trick today by failing to get a quote from Tebbit.

My worst public moment with Gio was when I was taking him for his evening constitutional and somehow he got hit by a car while still on his lead. Thankfully he was OK but I think I was more traumatised by the experience than him.


28 comments:

Tone made me do it - he's a bad influence said...

Jack Russells are great.

But what about a pair of black, standard poodles?

Tabman said...

"'The Perils of Owning a Jack Russell': Conservative Candidate admits bribing England Wicket-Keeper Shock!"

:o)

Buster George said...

Don't know about the dog but that damm easter bunny used to rob all my teeth.

Harry Basset said...

I work to keep my two Basset hounds in comfort, they can be very embarrassing at times, always stopping to lick their bottoms in the middle of the road as I try to cross. They haven't killed any little animals as they only hunt chocolate biscuits and armchairs.
To add a slightly political slant to this they always wear the English flag on their collars on 23rd April.

Giospy said...

My name is Giovanni and everybody at works shortens it to Gio.
With that in mind reading this entry has disturbed me very very much.

Ian said...

So you were "traumatised" even though your dog was "OK"? Victim culture personnified.

Verity said...

Awwwwwww ...

raincoaster said...

Jack Russells would find a way to get into trouble in a padded cell. But if you think that's bad, don't ever get a border collie. It's unnerving to see your dog checking the screen and feel relatively sure that she's correcting your spelling in her head. She probably has her own blog by now, and we all know the kind of trouble that brings.

Verity said...

I love the grey banner! I absolutely love it! Very chic!

Andrew Woodman said...

Jack Russell made me fall down a hill when I was a kid when it jumped out at me. Put me off them for life I'm afraid.

Bad news for the Hammers with Dean Ashton breaking his ankle Iain. Hope he isn't in your fantasy league team.

strapworld said...

Iain,

whilst we have a wonderful Jack Russell called 'Bails' the best true dog story was when I was in the old bill and a colleague called on a complainant, to take a statement.

It was in a run down part of the patch and when he knocked on the door an alsation started barking and ran up to him by the door barking away!

The door opened and the alsation rushed inside and my pal was invited in. He was taken to the living room where the dog was on the rug in front of the fire and it was chewing the rug, violently, after a while my pal said Cant you calm down your alsation?

MY alsation? shouted the houseowner I thought it was your bloody police dog!!

quite true!

Justin Hinchcliffe said...

We have two members - husband and wife - who have four adorable ferrets. I am surprised the ferret/polecat didn't 'lock' it's teeth into the dog's skin? They can be quite vicious. I note that the MP has not apologised to his constituent or offered to replace it...

Justin Hinchcliffe said...

We have two members - husband and wife - who have four adorable ferrets. I am surprised the ferret/polecat didn't 'lock' it's teeth into the dog's skin? They can be quite vicious. I note that the MP did not apologise to his constituent or offer to replave it...

garypowell said...

Iain may I sugest that if you have unsatified paternal neads you have some more/some children. Sad that someone your age does not have enough friends or more worthwile things to do. Not collecting up dog shit from the park and picking mut hair out of the furniture.

When Mrs Dale is to old for that type of thing, you may consider getting a real "grown-ups" dog.

strapworld said...

Iain,

so sorry about the west ham breaking his ankle. I suppose now you may wish to change your teams?

i drinkwater miss. said...

I knew Jack Russel personally.
He used to love to stroke my ferret.

Pulsar said...

Dave has spoken on homeland security flanked by DD & WH to add gravitas---today's top story---Jack Russell!
Have things changed since the A list?

sammy the sailor said...

strapworld 2.341

Hi Strap, how're the beans?

Durp! J Russell strong lead, no get away to fuck smaller animal. Why would you take a J russ, near a small mammal? Small brain perhaps!

Small animal owner, I've kept 'em and loved 'em, pull 'em up like a crane, lovey.

Better yet watch out for dogs and stay well away! No dog ever fucked one of my ferrets at a game fair. N.B. It was a polecat ferret, not a polecat! There is a difference, and the doggies treat a real polecat with great respect, as do foxes, buzzards etc. A polecat would leave it's mark on its attacker! Gypos, travellers etc. often sell polecat ferrets as Polecats, these are false. Polecats inhabit trees in dense woodland, and are rarely seen. Hence the name! Climb anything, jump off of anywhere. Polecats are absolute killers by instinct, and have no fear. Unless taken as young they cannot be humanised. Foxes will leave a bury pdq if a polecat shows up! Rats, no problem!Polecat roadkill are often confused with small badgers. Polecats are not often found and must be treated with respect. A polecat is not a ferret!

Having said all this, if you have a tamed polecat and you have a day ferreting, that is something else!

I luv em both poecats and ferrets!

Russell said...

I think you may be confused Gary (as well as needlessly offensive)... Iain's not the marrying kind....

stalin's gran said...

I had a jack Russell once. he bit my sister, aged 5. So e had him killed.

stalin's gran said...

Aged five - her, not him.

david kendrick said...

The grey banner reminds me of the Man Utd away strip they wore (once?) at Southampton a few years ago.

But you and Verity doubtless have more taste than me...

Verity said...

The other night, I looked down the back steps to see both my cats sitting on a lower step looking at the kitchen door with interest. Unperturbed, but with intense cat attention.

On looking to where they were looking, I saw something eating out of a dish I keep outside for a stray cat who comes round. But it wasn't her. And yet my two cats, territorial to the nth degree, weren't bothered. Hmmmm ... very strange. And anyway, I thought it looked a bit big for a cat, and actually, its tail was a bit long for a cat ... Suddenly, it looked up, and it wasn't a cat at all, but a coatimundi!

A friend said if it came back and I could catch it, she would have it as apparently they make lovely pets. Anyway, that it was in the center of a city and unperturbed by people or cats told me it was already someone's pet and it hasn't been back since.

Tone made me do it - he's a bad influence said...

b******s

-I meant to say King Charles Spaniels NOT Standard Poodles. My memory is going

Iain, Jack Russells are great.

But what about a pair of King Charles Spaniels, perhaps you could call them Kenneth and Carla?

Anonymous said...

Mrs Dale?! Anyways...Jack Russells are indeed great dogs. I'd love to have one, but work gets in the way. If there was a dog which did not mind being left on its own for 8 hours a day I'd be a happy bunny.

Hey said...

I'd suggest that everyone, Mr. Dale especially, invest in Google Toolbar for some spellcheck functionality!

Commenters typing in haste is one thing (as I'm well aware of my inability to type reliably in comments and IMs) but to write a post, especially as a prospective candidate, one should be very careful with the accuracy of the post.

Perhaps you should engage an intern or some PR folks to go over your posts, as you advance towards a candidacy.

Verity said...

anonymous 8:00pm - Get two cats. They don't mind being left alone all day, especially if they have each other. And they tidily and cleanly use their litter tray, so you don't have to worry that the poor thing waiting for you to come home is miserable from a bursting bladder.

A cat's day is mainly sleep (they sleep 14 hours out of every 24), punctuated by periods of frantic activity and chasing. Then a little snack, a period of looking out the window while grooming, and back to sleep. And they are beautiful to look at, elegant in movement and very affectionate.

JK said...

I hate the little cretins that bark all the time. I really want to kick the living crap of of the little shi*s.
I hate the way they always think they are top dog!