Tuesday, April 08, 2008

BNP Are Full of Virgins!

More than 2,000 of you have so far taken part in the Cleggover sex survey. What a great surprise it has been to find this has been the most popular survey so far!

I thought we'd start with revealing the party with the biggest proportion of virgins ... And it's the BNP. Admittedly only sixty BNP supporters took part, but it's the trend that counts!

BNP 29.6 per cent
Greens 15.2
Floating Voters 8.3
Conservative 6.2
LibDem 6.0
UKIP 5.3
Labour 4.0
SNP/Plaid 0.0

So not a single SNP or Plaid supporter is a virgin. This won't come as a surprise to many of us in England who feel we have been rogered by them for years! That is a joke, by the way.

More results tomorrow, including some of the funniest comments you left while taking the poll.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's the benefits of hanging about with Sean Connery.

Anonymous said...

Scotland is full of professional, if not actual virgins. Since I have been voting SNP my sex life has bombed.

The only surely accurate result in this farrago is that there are a lot of Green virgins. Too right. Who wants to touch the great unwashed?

Newmania said...

The Lib Dem Lover - Flexible and adroit at slyly altering position, usually likes to keep two on the go at once but secretly like the one on the left best. Oh baby !

UKIP- Believes there are assorted Continentals hiding in hiding in his wife’s cupboard who have 70% of the sex (…and he is quite right )

SNP -Unable to reach climax unless smothered in Oil

Greens Has convinced himself , by extrapolating models of genital friction ,that both of them will spontaneously combust at any moment, and it would be better to stop.

Lib Dem Excuse - On being caught in flagrante delicto he refuses to discuss where his member has been until ….‘We have seriously debated membership itself “. Or will simply walk out in a huff with such a convincing show of injury that the spouse is momentarily too confused to punch his lights out .

The Labour Lover- Tends to confuse his partner by re-announcing the previous nights orgasm instead of actually having sex .When , as is usually the case , struck with flaccidity , he drivels on about it being better than in than in 1997 in the hope his partner has forgotten what a splendid rogering was handed out by her …..

…Conservative Lover - Firm, and yet sensitive , considerate and yet comfortable with the individuals need to get his freak on. This paragon of all virtues will soon have the entire country shouting YES YES YES , starting with London

Go Boris .


OK the quality is varied here

Anonymous said...

We know what the BNP are full of and its not Virgins ....

Anonymous said...

How long until the first sheep joke?

Tom Ogg said...

Well no wonder they hate everyone else, eh? They're jealous and insecure.

Anonymous said...

psychotherapists would not be surprised. In fact, its pretty obvious really, the more insecure and dissatisfied we are with our lives, the more we look for someone else to blame. Not that virgins are the only people who are insecure and dissatisfied........actually scrap that. Sex seems to make people MORE insecure. Oh I don't know Iain, maybe lots of your BNP respondents just lied, well that would be a shock wouldn't it ;-)

John Trenchard said...

mayoral debate on newsnight right now.
red ken refused to say who is funding him.

Anonymous said...

Come on Dale. Who is gonna be the first idiot to state that Boris won the Newsnight debate.

Coz he was awfal, mummbling stammering tripping over himself

it was embarassing to watch

asquith said...

I know someone in the BNP who is a virgin (my age) and he still listens to mallcore music (Korn, Shitknot etc) despite the fact that barely anyone reaches 18 without realising that it's utter shite that should be avoided. I think his virginity, BNP affiliation and love of shite music are related and I think I can figure out how...

Anonymous said...

Speaking as the BNP voting gay virgin who lusted after Gordon Brown, can I ask if you have adjusted the figures at all for the possibility of people taking the mickey?

asquith said...

9:23, what kind of tit are you? I can't stand people who give false answers to surveys. It makes a mockery of the whole thing.

Anonymous said...

BNP supporters can't make love to anyone until they've managed a full DNA test. Just in case some non-Anglo Saxon DNA has slipped in there.

Anonymous said...

1:24, that reminds me of the Nazi eugenicists who arrested someone for having a face they deemed not to be Aryan-looking, then had to release him when he turned out to be a high-ranking Nazi official.

How we did laugh.

Anonymous said...

It seems that the Nationalists are not as opposed to the "Act of Union" as they claim! ;)

Anonymous said...

This really is crap science. You might as well have made the results up. I don't understand why you fill your blog, which is filled with otherwise decent analysis, with these gimmicks and top -insert any number here- lists. Can't help but feel that it is a cynical attempt to increase traffic rather than contribute to a useful debate. Professional blogger or not leave this kind of stuff to the tabloids where it belongs.